Let's all get crazy with the cheeze wiz

 

Guy facts:

when a guy calls u
he wants to be with you

When a guy is quiet,
He's listening to you

When a guy is not arguing,
He realizes he's wrong

When a guy says, "I'm fine," after a few minutes,
he means it

When a guy stares at you,
he thinks you're the most beautiful thing in the world

When you're laying you head on a guy's chest
he has the world

When a guy calls you everyday
he is in love

When a (good) guy say he loves you
he means it

When a guy says he can't live without you
he's with you till your done

When a guy says, "I miss you,"
he misses you more than you could have ever missed him or anything else

Girl facts:

When a girl is quiet,
millions of things are running through her mind.

When a girl is not arguing,
she is thinking deeply.

When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions,
she is wondering what your answers are.

When a girl answers, "I'm fine," after a few seconds,
she is not at all fine.

When a girl stares at you,
she is wondering why you are so wonderful. ..

When a girl lays on your chest,
she is wishing for you to be hers forever.

When a girl calls you everyday,
she wants to hear your voice.

When a girl wants to see you everyday,
she wants to be around you because you make her happy .

When a girl says, "I'll love you forever,"
she means it.

When a girl says that she can't live without you,
she has made up her mind that you are her future.

When a girl says, "I miss you,"
no one in this world can miss you more than that

A FATHER PASSING BY HIS SON'S BEDROOM WAS ASTONISHED TO SEE THE BED WAS
NICELY MADE AND EVERYTHING WAS PICKED UP.
THEN HE SAW AN ENVELOPE PROPPED UP PROMINENTLY ON THE CENTER OF THE BED. IT
WAS ADDRESSED, "DAD." WITH THE WORST PREMONITION, HE OPENED THE ENVELOPE
AND READ THE LETTER WITH TREMBLING HANDS:

DEAR DAD:
IT IS WITH GREAT REGRET AND SORROW THAT I'M WRITING THIS. I HAD TO ELOPE
WITH MY NEW GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE I WANTED TO AVOID A SCENE WITH MOM AND YOU.
I'VE BEEN FINDING REAL PASSION WITH BARBARA AND SHE IS SO NICE EVEN WITH ALL
HER PIERCING, TATTOOS, AND HER TIGHT MOTORCYCLE CLOTHES. BUT IT'S NOT ONLY
THE PASSION DAD, SHE'S PREGNANT AND BARBARA SAID THAT WE WILL BE VERY HAPPY
TOGETHER

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EVEN THOUGH YOU WON'T CARE FOR HER, AS SHE IS MUCH OLDER THAN I, SHE ALREADY
OWNS A TRAILER IN THE WOODS AND HAS A STACK OF FIREWOOD FOR THE WHOLE
WINTER. SHE WANTS TO HAVE MANY MORE CHILDREN WITH ME AND THAT'S NOW ONE OF
MY DREAMS TOO.

BARBARA TAUGHT ME THAT MARIJUANA DOESN'T REALLY HURT ANYONE AND WE'LL BE
GROWING IT FOR OURSELVES AND TRADING IT WITH HER FRIENDS FOR ALL THE COCAINE
AND ECSTASY (woo hoo ) WE WANT. IN THE MEANTIME, WE'LL PRAY THAT SCIENCE WILL FIND A
CURE FOR AIDS SO BARBARA CAN GET BETTER; SHE SURE DESERVES IT!!
DON'T WORRY DAD; I'M 15 YEARS OLD NOW AND I KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.
SOMEDAY I'M SURE WE'LL BE BACK TO VISIT SO YOU CAN GET TO KNOW YOUR
GRANDCHILDREN .

YOUR SON,

Bill

 

 

 

 

 

 

P.S. DAD, NONE OF THIS IS TRUE. I'M OVER AT THE NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE. I JUST
WANTED TO REMIND YOU THAT THERE ARE WORSE THINGS IN LIFE THAN MY REPORT CARD
THAT'S IN MY DESK, CENTER DRAWER. I LOVE YOU!

CALL WHEN IT'S SAFE FOR ME TO COME HOME.

Tech School:

Phase 5:

Phasse five means total freedom.  You can even take off from friday after school till monday at around 7 am.  Which is pretty cool.  You can not however still rent a hotel, so where do you go, who knows right.  It's also very stress full, cause you have your EMT training almost done. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Which means registry exam, and skills test.  That's a written test, and an onhands test where you're evaluated to treat a dummy for various injuries.  The cool thing is that you can ask girls to help you with this, and you have to put your hands all over their body, searching for injuries ofcourse.  I was actually searching for something else though.  I had the whole thing down, but I still faked studying.  So I was messing around big deal, it was fun for both of us, don't judge me, bite me.  Anyway, the time for you to leave gets nearer, and you have to start getting read of all your crap.  Or you start shipping it out.  If your me though, your techschool happens to overlap Christmass, and being the type of person that I am, I feel it a waste to go all the way home just for Christmass.  So I get to pull CQ duty during this time.  I get to basically watch everyone that goes into the and out of the dorms, and meat some Navy people.  By the way, they are actually called Seamen, which sounds just like...  Hahaha, that's so funny, and I let my scemen, I mean seamen friends know it, especially this one girl, that I seemed to get along really well with.  She was cool, but I only knew her for two weeks which sucked.  When everyone came back, I met this one girl as I was pulling guard duty at the back entrance of the dorm. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Her ID read almost exactly like mine, it was weird.  Same height, hair color, birth date, age, everything but the name, and place where she got it.  It was pretty cool and we kind of bonded for a while, but somehow, I stopped hearing from her, which sucked, cause she seemed cool also.  I met this other cool girl, and I had one of my friends that knew her.  She was pretty cool aswell, and right now I'm wishing I had a much better memory with names, cause I can't remember any of them.  Anyway, she spoke spanish, but I didn't know, and my friend asked me if I thought she was good looking in spanish and I answeared heck yes, she's definetly good looking, in spanish ofcourse, and the she said, I bet you didn't know I spoke spanish, in spanish too, and I just felt like such a moron.  My friend knew, and he had framed me, that's messed up huh.  Oh well, I hung out with her a couple of times, and met some other girls here and there, but eventually I got shipped off base, and to my permanent duty station, Lackland AFB, the black hole of the medical field in the Air Force.  From there, I would spend the rest of my Air Force career.  Well That's it for tech school hope this was interesting to read, and informative. 

 

 

 

 

 

Days as an A1C will be coming soon, as well as Diaries of a Med Tech, which will have some graphic content, anyway, what did yall think, leave me a message with any questions, and I'll answear them, or just leave me a comment and let me know what you thought of my story.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares.... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using
different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and,
then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here! '

16. Put a bag of M&M's on lay-away.

Tech School:

Phase 3 and 4:

So you're trying like hell to hook up left and right, and so are girls, its a great time to be a guy, exept that you can't get any alone time with the girl.  Also now you get to go out to the mall and stuff.  So you go to the mall, and check out the civilians.  You go around spending you're money without regard, since you should have atleast 500$ to do with as you wish.  I had around 2000$ though, so I went crazy with watches, shoes, clothes.  Plus if you're like me, and look years younger than you are, even now I look twenty to eighteen and younger when I shave everything, even though I'm like twenty five.  So when I was there, at the mall this four girls came up to me inviting me to a slumber party.  However being that I was in the F*cking Air Force, and that being of age, and them not, I didn't go. 

 

 

 

 

 

Which completely sucked, cause they were very nice looking.  2 of them were like foruteen though, one fifteen, and one sixteen.  Dam statutory rape law.  Anyway, I went on buying stuff, and knew I made the right choice declining the invite, cause as soon as I got to the bus to go back to base, a guy told me he saw me talking to those girls.  So my ass would have been grass if I had gone.  You get to meet alot of cool people there, and alot of would be girlfriends, if it wasn't for the fact that everyone was gonna go thir separate ways.  So you go to the pool halls, and you meet friends.  You go to the BDU club wich is a club on base, and you go to Grams Central Station, those of you from the Valley reading this, yes its the same Grams way up in wichita Falls, and the only club to go to there, so it sucks.  However, you make friends, and meet girls, and move on with your life.